1
00:00:10,643 --> 00:00:13,313
(no voice)

2
00:00:13,313 --> 00:00:18,852
♪ I bet we've been together
for a million years ♪

3
00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:24,557
♪ And I bet we'll be together
for a million more ♪

4
00:00:24,557 --> 00:00:27,060
♪ Oh, it's like
I started breathing ♪

5
00:00:27,060 --> 00:00:29,863
♪ On the night we kissed ♪

6
00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:35,101
♪ And I can't remember
what I ever did before ♪

7
00:00:35,101 --> 00:00:40,840
♪ What would we do, baby,
without us? ♪

8
00:00:40,840 --> 00:00:46,112
♪ What would we do, baby,
without us? ♪

9
00:00:46,112 --> 00:00:52,385
♪ And there ain't no nothing we
can't love each other through ♪

10
00:00:52,385 --> 00:00:57,590
♪ What would we do, baby,
without us? ♪

11
00:00:57,590 --> 00:01:00,388
♪ Sha-la-la-la. ♪

12
00:01:00,400 --> 00:01:06,600
<b>Ripped By mstoll</b>

13
00:01:06,666 --> 00:01:08,435
Okay, now don't roll
the dough too thin.

14
00:01:08,435 --> 00:01:10,003
The cookies will burn
in the oven.

15
00:01:10,003 --> 00:01:11,704
Why can't we get them
at the store

16
00:01:11,704 --> 00:01:14,874
like everybody else does?

17
00:01:14,874 --> 00:01:16,376
It's more fun this way.

18
00:01:16,376 --> 00:01:18,011
This is a special time

19
00:01:18,011 --> 00:01:19,612
between a mommy
and her little boy.

20
00:01:19,612 --> 00:01:21,748
You know, just the two of us
here together,

21
00:01:21,748 --> 00:01:24,617
kind of working,
sharing, creating.

22
00:01:24,617 --> 00:01:26,608
Mom, they're just cookies.

23
00:01:28,621 --> 00:01:31,124
Whoa! Okay, guy,
we'll try it again tomorrow.

24
00:01:31,124 --> 00:01:32,792
- Hey, hot cookies.
- Spud Webb.

25
00:01:32,792 --> 00:01:34,661
Hey, Andy.

26
00:01:34,661 --> 00:01:37,564
Andy, what are you wearing?

27
00:01:37,564 --> 00:01:39,299
An apron.

28
00:01:39,299 --> 00:01:41,290
Take that off this minute.

29
00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:44,504
Guys don't wear aprons.

30
00:01:44,504 --> 00:01:45,672
Yeah.

31
00:01:45,672 --> 00:01:48,908
Anyway, that's my apron.

32
00:01:48,908 --> 00:01:52,078
This is a totally inappropriate
activity for Andy.

33
00:01:52,078 --> 00:01:53,446
I mean, uh, making cookies?

34
00:01:53,446 --> 00:01:56,416
It's one step away
from having his nails done.

35
00:01:56,416 --> 00:01:59,652
That's tomorrow.

36
00:01:59,652 --> 00:02:01,621
All right, it's time
for the guys to take over,

37
00:02:01,621 --> 00:02:02,722
teach him a little grit.

38
00:02:02,722 --> 00:02:04,023
That's ridiculous.

39
00:02:04,023 --> 00:02:06,059
We've-we've been raising him
in a sensitive,

40
00:02:06,059 --> 00:02:08,461
nonsexist atmosphere
for almost six years now.

41
00:02:08,461 --> 00:02:10,797
Everything's worked out fine,
right, Steven?

42
00:02:10,797 --> 00:02:14,200
Well, um, you know, uh...

43
00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:16,035
sure, sure.

44
00:02:16,035 --> 00:02:19,205
But there's, uh, there's nothing
wrong with a little balance.

45
00:02:19,205 --> 00:02:21,040
Little yin, a little, uh...

46
00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:22,442
Yang.

47
00:02:22,442 --> 00:02:24,433
...yang.

48
00:02:26,446 --> 00:02:28,681
Maybe it's, uh,

49
00:02:28,681 --> 00:02:30,683
maybe it's time
to try something different,

50
00:02:30,683 --> 00:02:32,352
something guy-ish.

51
00:02:32,352 --> 00:02:35,255
Want to go shave?

52
00:02:35,255 --> 00:02:37,690
Hey, how about basketball, huh?

53
00:02:37,690 --> 00:02:39,526
Basketball.

54
00:02:39,526 --> 00:02:41,594
It'll teach you
the thrill of competition,

55
00:02:41,594 --> 00:02:45,698
the exhilaration of exercise,
the reward of team spirit.

56
00:02:45,698 --> 00:02:48,268
You just want someone
you can beat, Alex.

57
00:02:48,268 --> 00:02:50,303
Hey, I beat you, blondie.

58
00:02:50,303 --> 00:02:51,604
You wouldn't have
beaten me, Alex,

59
00:02:51,604 --> 00:02:54,471
if you'd have let me
use both hands.

60
00:02:57,277 --> 00:03:00,480
Oh, I thought I heard Nick
down here.

61
00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:02,849
(deep voice):
Hey.

62
00:03:02,849 --> 00:03:04,184
- What's going on?
- Thanks.

63
00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:06,019
Um, Nick had a job interview.

64
00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:07,520
He's supposed
to come over here afterwards.

65
00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:09,822
What kind of job
is Nick trying to get now?

66
00:03:09,822 --> 00:03:11,891
It's a grant.
I saw the job listing on campus,

67
00:03:11,891 --> 00:03:13,760
and I knew Nick
would be perfect for it.

68
00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:15,061
What is it?

69
00:03:15,061 --> 00:03:17,791
Dean of Admissions.

70
00:03:20,900 --> 00:03:22,802
I'll keep
my fingers crossed, Mal.

71
00:03:22,802 --> 00:03:24,270
- Oh, thanks, Jen.
- (knocking)

72
00:03:24,270 --> 00:03:25,738
Hey, what happened?

73
00:03:25,738 --> 00:03:27,373
Did you get it?
When do you start?

74
00:03:27,373 --> 00:03:29,108
Aw, Mal.

75
00:03:29,108 --> 00:03:30,677
I didn't get the job.

76
00:03:30,677 --> 00:03:31,978
You know, I don't think

77
00:03:31,978 --> 00:03:33,846
I'm going to be
Dean of Admissions.

78
00:03:33,846 --> 00:03:35,181
I am shocked.

79
00:03:35,181 --> 00:03:36,683
- I, for one, am flabbergasted.
- Stunned.

80
00:03:36,683 --> 00:03:37,784
That's an outrage.

81
00:03:37,784 --> 00:03:38,918
Why not?

82
00:03:38,918 --> 00:03:40,119
You know, for one thing,

83
00:03:40,119 --> 00:03:41,921
the job starts
at 9:00 in the morning,

84
00:03:41,921 --> 00:03:43,623
and I like to do my art then.

85
00:03:43,623 --> 00:03:47,293
Either that or lie there
and stare at the ceiling.

86
00:03:47,293 --> 00:03:49,896
You don't want to give that up.

87
00:03:49,896 --> 00:03:51,397
What about being
Dean of Admissions

88
00:03:51,397 --> 00:03:52,532
for night school?

89
00:03:52,532 --> 00:03:53,833
Nah, Mal, you know,

90
00:03:53,833 --> 00:03:57,403
I think this whole dean area
is a dead issue.

91
00:03:57,403 --> 00:03:59,394
You can head up
the English Department.

92
00:04:02,475 --> 00:04:03,843
There was this other job

93
00:04:03,843 --> 00:04:05,612
that they thought
I might be right for.

94
00:04:05,612 --> 00:04:07,547
Oh, janitor.

95
00:04:07,547 --> 00:04:08,715
Nick, I think
you're on to something.

96
00:04:08,715 --> 00:04:09,882
There you go. There you go.

97
00:04:09,882 --> 00:04:12,485
Nick, this is the janitor job
at my sorority.

98
00:04:12,485 --> 00:04:14,120
I'm the one who wrote the ad.

99
00:04:14,120 --> 00:04:15,455
"Janitor needed.

100
00:04:15,455 --> 00:04:18,758
Must have previous
trash experience."

101
00:04:18,758 --> 00:04:21,027
How romantic.

102
00:04:21,027 --> 00:04:24,530
Well, you have previous trash
experience, don't you, Nick?

103
00:04:24,530 --> 00:04:28,668
Well, I don't want to toot
my own horn, you know.

104
00:04:28,668 --> 00:04:29,902
This is exciting.

105
00:04:29,902 --> 00:04:31,938
You, my sorority, trash.

106
00:04:31,938 --> 00:04:34,540
It's all coming together.

107
00:04:34,540 --> 00:04:36,576
Okay, there's just
two more applicants

108
00:04:36,576 --> 00:04:37,910
for the janitor job.

109
00:04:37,910 --> 00:04:41,414
Uh, Larry Briganti
and Nick Moore.

110
00:04:41,414 --> 00:04:44,450
Mallory, maybe you should
sit out those interviews.

111
00:04:44,450 --> 00:04:46,052
I mean, with your boyfriend

112
00:04:46,052 --> 00:04:47,487
being one of the applicants
and all.

113
00:04:47,487 --> 00:04:49,122
Karen, I'm going
to be completely

114
00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:50,690
and totally impartial here.

115
00:04:50,690 --> 00:04:52,892
I want what's best
for the sorority.

116
00:04:52,892 --> 00:04:55,561
Well, Mr. Briganti,

117
00:04:55,561 --> 00:04:58,231
can you tell us something
about your qualifications?

118
00:04:58,231 --> 00:05:01,134
I was chairman of the
Custodial Institute of America

119
00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:05,405
from 1945 through 1980,

120
00:05:05,405 --> 00:05:09,309
Ohio Janitor of the Year 1983,

121
00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:13,143
and inventor
of the world famous Johnny Mop.

122
00:05:15,181 --> 00:05:18,685
Well, that's all fine and good,
but, uh,

123
00:05:18,685 --> 00:05:22,221
have you ever worked
at a sorority before?

124
00:05:22,221 --> 00:05:24,957
Can't say that I have.

125
00:05:24,957 --> 00:05:26,626
Well, do you think
you could handle

126
00:05:26,626 --> 00:05:28,494
a place of this size?

127
00:05:28,494 --> 00:05:32,398
Well, I mean, if the White House
wasn't a problem,

128
00:05:32,398 --> 00:05:35,268
I can't imagine
this place would be.

129
00:05:35,268 --> 00:05:36,803
Well, thank you.

130
00:05:36,803 --> 00:05:38,538
We'll-we'll have
to get back to you.

131
00:05:38,538 --> 00:05:40,707
W-Well, let me know
as soon as you can.

132
00:05:40,707 --> 00:05:44,143
It's either this
or the Taj Mahal.

133
00:05:44,143 --> 00:05:46,179
Nick Moore, please.

134
00:05:46,179 --> 00:05:48,948
(clears throat)

135
00:05:48,948 --> 00:05:50,416
Hey.

136
00:05:50,416 --> 00:05:53,252
That's janitor for "hello."

137
00:05:53,252 --> 00:05:55,388
Sisters, this is Nick Moore.

138
00:05:55,388 --> 00:05:58,925
Let's give him
a nice Gamma Delta Gamma "hi."

139
00:05:58,925 --> 00:06:00,916
WOMEN:
Hi.

140
00:06:02,895 --> 00:06:05,064
So, Nick, um,

141
00:06:05,064 --> 00:06:07,767
can you tell us something
about yourself?

142
00:06:07,767 --> 00:06:10,303
Well, you know, I-I got
to tell youse all right off,

143
00:06:10,303 --> 00:06:13,740
I have no janitorial experience.

144
00:06:13,740 --> 00:06:17,210
I like that.

145
00:06:17,210 --> 00:06:19,278
He's honest.

146
00:06:19,278 --> 00:06:21,981
That's the most important thing
in a janitor.

147
00:06:21,981 --> 00:06:23,149
Look, you know,

148
00:06:23,149 --> 00:06:25,084
uh, I know if it wasn't
for Mal here,

149
00:06:25,084 --> 00:06:26,786
I wouldn't even be considered
for this job,

150
00:06:26,786 --> 00:06:29,822
and, uh, I got to tell youse,
I feel a little bit nervous

151
00:06:29,822 --> 00:06:31,457
being around
all you smart girls.

152
00:06:31,457 --> 00:06:33,159
Oh, Nick, no, don't be, please.

153
00:06:33,159 --> 00:06:35,027
No one's ever been nervous
around us.

154
00:06:35,027 --> 00:06:38,019
No one's ever
called us smart, either.

155
00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:43,002
Uh, you know, I can't help it.

156
00:06:43,002 --> 00:06:45,271
You see, uh,
college is not a place

157
00:06:45,271 --> 00:06:46,773
that I'm all that familiar with.

158
00:06:46,773 --> 00:06:49,208
Uh, actually, uh, high school

159
00:06:49,208 --> 00:06:53,012
is not a place I'm all that...
familiar with, either.

160
00:06:53,012 --> 00:06:54,981
But, uh, reform school, ha!

161
00:06:54,981 --> 00:06:58,651
Now, there's something
we could talk about.

162
00:06:58,651 --> 00:07:00,052
Actually, Nick,

163
00:07:00,052 --> 00:07:03,256
a formal education is not
a requirement for this job.

164
00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:06,359
Hey, then I'm your guy.

165
00:07:06,359 --> 00:07:10,530
But, you know, some-some
interpersonal, uh, qualities

166
00:07:10,530 --> 00:07:14,133
you-you have that we might
not know about could be helpful.

167
00:07:14,133 --> 00:07:16,969
Um, for instance, um, just a...

168
00:07:16,969 --> 00:07:19,172
Are you an artist?

169
00:07:19,172 --> 00:07:22,041
Why, yes, I am.

170
00:07:22,041 --> 00:07:23,876
Oh!

171
00:07:23,876 --> 00:07:26,646
It might be great
having an artist in residence.

172
00:07:26,646 --> 00:07:29,282
He can help us with floats,
banners, posters.

173
00:07:29,282 --> 00:07:31,717
Maybe he could help us
come up with decorations

174
00:07:31,717 --> 00:07:33,319
- for the winter dance.
- Yes.

175
00:07:33,319 --> 00:07:35,188
Well, uh, what seems
to be the problem?

176
00:07:35,188 --> 00:07:37,757
We've tried paper snowflakes,
paper snowmen.

177
00:07:37,757 --> 00:07:39,459
It's just,
it's all been done before.

178
00:07:39,459 --> 00:07:42,161
We've got a wastebasket
full of bad ideas.

179
00:07:42,161 --> 00:07:43,830
Well, wait a minute, here.

180
00:07:43,830 --> 00:07:47,066
Now, uh, what you see
as, uh, bad ideas,

181
00:07:47,066 --> 00:07:48,835
I see as snowballs.

182
00:07:48,835 --> 00:07:49,635
What?

183
00:07:49,635 --> 00:07:51,170
Uh, you see, you could, uh,

184
00:07:51,170 --> 00:07:54,207
you could take
a whole bunch of these and, uh,

185
00:07:54,207 --> 00:07:58,044
crumple them all up
and cut them into snowballs

186
00:07:58,044 --> 00:08:02,014
and have... a winter wonderland

187
00:08:02,014 --> 00:08:04,717
of snowballs
for your sorority dance.

188
00:08:04,717 --> 00:08:06,919
I like that. I like that.
Go with it.

189
00:08:06,919 --> 00:08:09,489
Uh, see, you can, uh,

190
00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:11,224
throw them at each other
and have a fight,

191
00:08:11,224 --> 00:08:13,793
or, uh, you can glue them
together and make a fort,

192
00:08:13,793 --> 00:08:15,495
or you could just
pour water on them

193
00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:18,231
and turn them into slush.

194
00:08:18,231 --> 00:08:19,398
Okay.

195
00:08:19,398 --> 00:08:20,666
All those in favor of Nick?

196
00:08:20,666 --> 00:08:22,602
WOMEN:
Aye.

197
00:08:22,602 --> 00:08:24,370
Well, it's settled.
Welcome, Nick.

198
00:08:24,370 --> 00:08:25,571
Let's all give him

199
00:08:25,571 --> 00:08:27,073
a nice Gamma Delta Gamma
"You're hired."

200
00:08:27,073 --> 00:08:29,709
WOMEN:
You're hired!

201
00:08:29,709 --> 00:08:31,511
Okay, now,
the object of the game

202
00:08:31,511 --> 00:08:35,414
is simply to toss this ball
into the basket.

203
00:08:35,414 --> 00:08:36,949
Humor him.

204
00:08:36,949 --> 00:08:38,280
All right, now try it.

205
00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:42,588
All right.
Well, that's pretty good.

206
00:08:42,588 --> 00:08:43,856
That's pretty good.

207
00:08:43,856 --> 00:08:45,625
Now let me, uh, let me show you
how it's done.

208
00:08:45,625 --> 00:08:47,059
There you go. Oops.

209
00:08:47,059 --> 00:08:48,761
Hey, hey, Dad,
let me have a shot.

210
00:08:48,761 --> 00:08:50,196
I think Andy should have
the pleasure

211
00:08:50,196 --> 00:08:53,099
of seeing the ball actually
go through the hoop once.

212
00:08:53,099 --> 00:08:55,334
- Give me the ball.
- Forget it.

213
00:08:55,334 --> 00:08:57,203
- Dad, give me the ball.
- Alex, I'm teaching him.

214
00:08:57,203 --> 00:08:58,671
- Give me the ball!
- I'm teaching him!

215
00:08:58,671 --> 00:09:01,107
Andy, let's get out of here
before it gets ugly.

216
00:09:01,107 --> 00:09:03,075
(Steven and Alex grunting)

217
00:09:03,075 --> 00:09:04,410
Come on. Come on.

218
00:09:04,410 --> 00:09:05,511
Here we go. Hey!

219
00:09:05,511 --> 00:09:07,013
Two points!

220
00:09:07,013 --> 00:09:08,810
Oh!

221
00:09:10,816 --> 00:09:13,119
What is going on?

222
00:09:13,119 --> 00:09:16,322
We're-we're teaching Andy
how to, how to play basketball.

223
00:09:16,322 --> 00:09:18,313
- Andy...
- Andy? (whistles)

224
00:09:19,759 --> 00:09:22,161
I don't want any more basketball
in the house, Steven.

225
00:09:22,161 --> 00:09:24,130
Okay, okay.

226
00:09:24,130 --> 00:09:27,500
You know, he really is
a discipline problem, Mom.

227
00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:29,502
Cheater.

228
00:09:29,502 --> 00:09:30,636
(chuckles):
Yeah.

229
00:09:30,636 --> 00:09:31,837
Oh, hey.

230
00:09:31,837 --> 00:09:33,773
- Hi.
- Hey, you going out?

231
00:09:33,773 --> 00:09:35,074
Oh, yeah.

232
00:09:35,074 --> 00:09:36,542
Nick's coming over
to pick me up.

233
00:09:36,542 --> 00:09:38,411
We're going to go to his place
and watch TV.

234
00:09:38,411 --> 00:09:40,513
How's Nick doing
down at the sorority?

235
00:09:40,513 --> 00:09:41,914
Oh, great.

236
00:09:41,914 --> 00:09:44,116
Um, he gets along really well
with all the girls,

237
00:09:44,116 --> 00:09:45,985
and they all think
he's lots of fun.

238
00:09:45,985 --> 00:09:49,255
So he's always hanging out there
and learning songs and stuff.

239
00:09:49,255 --> 00:09:51,157
I-I really admire
what Nick's doing.

240
00:09:51,157 --> 00:09:53,292
It must be awfully hard
to be a janitor.

241
00:09:53,292 --> 00:09:54,493
Especially at your sorority.

242
00:09:54,493 --> 00:09:56,228
Well, he's really gotten
into it.

243
00:09:56,228 --> 00:09:57,630
You know, he's always there.

244
00:09:57,630 --> 00:09:59,198
But today he's coming over,

245
00:09:59,198 --> 00:10:01,500
and it's just going to be
the two of us together.

246
00:10:01,500 --> 00:10:03,736
We're going to make popcorn
and watch cartoons.

247
00:10:03,736 --> 00:10:05,567
The old think tank
in action, huh?

248
00:10:07,540 --> 00:10:09,542
- Have a wonderful time.
- Thanks.

249
00:10:09,542 --> 00:10:10,977
(Nick and women chattering)

250
00:10:10,977 --> 00:10:12,979
Hey.

251
00:10:12,979 --> 00:10:15,881
WOMEN:
Hi.

252
00:10:15,881 --> 00:10:18,451
Um, Nick, what's going on?

253
00:10:18,451 --> 00:10:20,453
Uh, Mal, little change of plans.

254
00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:22,555
We're all going to go
over the football game.

255
00:10:22,555 --> 00:10:24,991
Oh, I-I thought we were going
to spend the afternoon together.

256
00:10:24,991 --> 00:10:26,492
I mean, just the two of us.

257
00:10:26,492 --> 00:10:27,927
Yeah, I know, you know,

258
00:10:27,927 --> 00:10:30,162
but that was before the girls
asked me to go to the game.

259
00:10:30,162 --> 00:10:32,865
You never liked
football before, Nick.

260
00:10:32,865 --> 00:10:34,567
I never knew the cheers before.

261
00:10:34,567 --> 00:10:36,602
But now...

262
00:10:36,602 --> 00:10:38,771
(chanting): Hear us rave.
Hear us rant.

263
00:10:38,771 --> 00:10:41,440
Win team, win.
Let's go, Grant. Hey!

264
00:10:41,440 --> 00:10:43,431
WOMEN:
Hey!

265
00:10:47,380 --> 00:10:49,482
Hey.

266
00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:52,280
This is really scary.

267
00:10:54,353 --> 00:10:56,055
Come on, uh, you know,
it's Sorority Day.

268
00:10:56,055 --> 00:10:57,990
All us girls get in
for half price.

269
00:10:57,990 --> 00:10:58,991
Yeah.

270
00:10:58,991 --> 00:11:00,159
Oh.

271
00:11:00,159 --> 00:11:01,994
I have a lot of homework to do.

272
00:11:01,994 --> 00:11:04,997
So you all go ahead
and have fun.

273
00:11:04,997 --> 00:11:06,165
(groans):
Oh.

274
00:11:06,165 --> 00:11:07,299
All right, babe.

275
00:11:07,299 --> 00:11:08,601
Well, uh,
we'll see you later, huh?

276
00:11:08,601 --> 00:11:09,935
And, uh,
don't work too hard, huh?

277
00:11:09,935 --> 00:11:11,070
WOMEN:
Bye-bye.

278
00:11:11,070 --> 00:11:13,873
NICK and WOMEN:
Hear us rave! Hear us rant!

279
00:11:13,873 --> 00:11:16,637
Win team, win!
Let's go, Grant! Hey!

280
00:11:20,246 --> 00:11:21,747
- Okay.
- Where's Mallory?

281
00:11:21,747 --> 00:11:24,417
She's upstairs getting ready
for her sorority dance.

282
00:11:24,417 --> 00:11:26,018
I want to give her this truck

283
00:11:26,018 --> 00:11:28,454
for her to bring
with her tonight.

284
00:11:28,454 --> 00:11:29,955
That's a great idea, Andy.

285
00:11:29,955 --> 00:11:31,457
That'll make Mallory
the only girl

286
00:11:31,457 --> 00:11:33,325
at the dance with a truck.

287
00:11:33,325 --> 00:11:36,762
Everybody will be
really jealous.

288
00:11:36,762 --> 00:11:38,097
Come on,
let's give Mallory that truck.

289
00:11:38,097 --> 00:11:39,432
- Oh, yeah.
- I'm sure she doesn't have

290
00:11:39,432 --> 00:11:40,599
anything like it in her closet.

291
00:11:40,599 --> 00:11:43,536
(chuckles):
Yeah, that's great.

292
00:11:43,536 --> 00:11:45,071
(Alex groans)

293
00:11:45,071 --> 00:11:46,806
(snaps fingers, whistles)

294
00:11:46,806 --> 00:11:49,241
Oh, come on!

295
00:11:49,241 --> 00:11:50,943
- I'm telling.
- Oh, oh, oh!

296
00:11:50,943 --> 00:11:52,978
Come on. Come on,
this is the one that counts.

297
00:11:52,978 --> 00:11:54,180
Hey, short stuff!

298
00:11:54,180 --> 00:11:56,774
ELYSE: Steven, we need
a lightbulb up here!

299
00:12:28,681 --> 00:12:31,917
All right, you're both grounded.

300
00:12:31,917 --> 00:12:33,085
I told you this would happen.

301
00:12:33,085 --> 00:12:34,987
- You told me? I told you.
- Come on.

302
00:12:34,987 --> 00:12:36,477
I've been telling him for days.
He started it.

303
00:12:38,424 --> 00:12:40,526
Hi.

304
00:12:40,526 --> 00:12:41,794
Hi, Jen.

305
00:12:41,794 --> 00:12:43,696
That's a fabulous dress,
Mallory.

306
00:12:43,696 --> 00:12:46,065
It really goes with the truck.

307
00:12:46,065 --> 00:12:48,795
STEVEN: Boy, you sure
look great, honey. Really.

308
00:12:50,803 --> 00:12:53,105
I'm just not up for it tonight.

309
00:12:53,105 --> 00:12:55,474
I mean, ever since they made
Nick an honorary member

310
00:12:55,474 --> 00:12:58,511
of the sorority, I never get
to see him alone anymore.

311
00:12:58,511 --> 00:13:00,980
And when I do, it's always
Gamma Delta Gamma this,

312
00:13:00,980 --> 00:13:02,114
Gamma Delta Gamma that.

313
00:13:02,114 --> 00:13:03,582
It's making me crazy.

314
00:13:03,582 --> 00:13:06,312
I never thought I-I'd have
to call my boyfriend "Sister."

315
00:13:08,154 --> 00:13:10,456
Oh, I don't know, Mal,
I think it's kind of cute.

316
00:13:10,456 --> 00:13:12,625
I mean, picture him right now.

317
00:13:12,625 --> 00:13:16,362
He's at home,
choosing an outfit,

318
00:13:16,362 --> 00:13:18,397
primping,

319
00:13:18,397 --> 00:13:21,801
putting on Dippity-do.

320
00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:24,103
I can't believe
the way Nick has changed.

321
00:13:24,103 --> 00:13:27,873
Now he's hopping around
all the time, perky, singing.

322
00:13:27,873 --> 00:13:30,671
It's like going out
with Annette Funicello.

323
00:13:33,445 --> 00:13:35,581
Honey, did you tell him
how you feel?

324
00:13:35,581 --> 00:13:37,483
- No, not yet.
- (doorbell rings)

325
00:13:37,483 --> 00:13:39,474
I'll get it.

326
00:13:42,721 --> 00:13:44,123
Hey.

327
00:13:44,123 --> 00:13:45,858
Mal.

328
00:13:45,858 --> 00:13:47,193
It's Sister.

329
00:13:47,193 --> 00:13:48,888
(clears throat)

330
00:13:49,929 --> 00:13:51,230
- Say, uh, Mr. Keaton?
- Mm-hmm?

331
00:13:51,230 --> 00:13:53,098
Would you be interested
in buying some raffle tickets?

332
00:13:53,098 --> 00:13:55,167
- No, I...
- You see, we're trying to bring

333
00:13:55,167 --> 00:13:56,969
some members of our sorority
over from China.

334
00:13:56,969 --> 00:14:00,606
Oh. Well, th-that's great, Nick.

335
00:14:00,606 --> 00:14:01,807
We're just leaving, too.

336
00:14:01,807 --> 00:14:04,610
Ah-ah-ah, but-but-but let me
share with you,

337
00:14:04,610 --> 00:14:07,112
uh, a little secret
that I learned from the girls.

338
00:14:07,112 --> 00:14:10,349
Hairspray helps remove
ink spots.

339
00:14:10,349 --> 00:14:11,407
Got it.

340
00:14:13,319 --> 00:14:15,554
So, uh, Mal, you look great.

341
00:14:15,554 --> 00:14:19,225
Nick, I think you've been taking
the sorority stuff

342
00:14:19,225 --> 00:14:21,160
a little too seriously.

343
00:14:21,160 --> 00:14:24,129
Oh, really?

344
00:14:24,129 --> 00:14:26,265
(clears throat)

345
00:14:26,265 --> 00:14:28,434
Well, uh, you know, Mal,

346
00:14:28,434 --> 00:14:31,136
I was hoping maybe some of it
would rub off on you.

347
00:14:31,136 --> 00:14:33,038
And if something does
rub off on you,

348
00:14:33,038 --> 00:14:37,276
may I suggest rinsing it briskly
with some Epsom salt.

349
00:14:37,276 --> 00:14:40,112
Nick, I think
you're missing my point.

350
00:14:40,112 --> 00:14:42,715
I think you've become
a little too involved

351
00:14:42,715 --> 00:14:44,650
with Gamma Delta Gamma.

352
00:14:44,650 --> 00:14:46,185
Well, Mal, you know, I think

353
00:14:46,185 --> 00:14:48,387
you take Gamma Delta Gamma
a little for granted.

354
00:14:48,387 --> 00:14:50,990
You see, I don't think
you show it enough respect.

355
00:14:50,990 --> 00:14:52,424
As a matter of fact, you know,

356
00:14:52,424 --> 00:14:55,694
I have been reviewing the, uh,
Gamma Delta Gamma rule book,

357
00:14:55,694 --> 00:14:58,130
and, uh, I have found out
that you break

358
00:14:58,130 --> 00:15:00,266
almost every rule in it.

359
00:15:00,266 --> 00:15:01,667
For instance,

360
00:15:01,667 --> 00:15:04,670
you should only
entertain male visitors

361
00:15:04,670 --> 00:15:07,072
on the porch or in the parlor.

362
00:15:07,072 --> 00:15:09,700
You should never cross your legs
while wearing a skirt.

363
00:15:12,578 --> 00:15:16,248
And at all sorority functions
after 6:00 p.m.,

364
00:15:16,248 --> 00:15:18,250
you should always wear gloves.

365
00:15:18,250 --> 00:15:20,419
Nick, those rules are from 1937.

366
00:15:20,419 --> 00:15:21,553
Hey, so what?

367
00:15:21,553 --> 00:15:24,290
You know, you still
got to follow them.

368
00:15:24,290 --> 00:15:28,021
Listen, Mal, I would really hate
to bring you up on charges.

369
00:15:29,461 --> 00:15:32,164
Now, look, you're
a Gamma Delta Gamma girl, huh?

370
00:15:32,164 --> 00:15:33,358
Act like one.

371
00:15:34,733 --> 00:15:36,669
(rock music playing,
Nick humming)

372
00:15:36,669 --> 00:15:39,605
Hey, babe, great party, huh?

373
00:15:39,605 --> 00:15:41,173
Oh, yeah, it's great.

374
00:15:41,173 --> 00:15:43,542
I hope you don't mind me doing a
little cleaning up now and then.

375
00:15:43,542 --> 00:15:45,644
Oh, no, go right ahead;
it's your job.

376
00:15:45,644 --> 00:15:46,979
Okay.

377
00:15:46,979 --> 00:15:49,715
Oh, uh, you know, say,
you really should put that drink

378
00:15:49,715 --> 00:15:51,317
on a coaster, not on the table.

379
00:15:51,317 --> 00:15:52,718
You're going to ruin
the finish there.

380
00:15:52,718 --> 00:15:54,119
Thank you.

381
00:15:54,119 --> 00:15:55,554
(clears throat)

382
00:15:55,554 --> 00:15:58,324
Nick, congratulations.

383
00:15:58,324 --> 00:15:59,992
Everyone just loves
all the decorations.

384
00:15:59,992 --> 00:16:01,727
You really did a great job.

385
00:16:01,727 --> 00:16:03,095
Oh, hey, thanks.

386
00:16:03,095 --> 00:16:05,764
My favorite is definitely
the mothball igloo.

387
00:16:05,764 --> 00:16:07,066
- Oh, yes.
- Oh, yeah.

388
00:16:07,066 --> 00:16:08,367
Me, too.

389
00:16:08,367 --> 00:16:10,836
You know, it's, uh, attractive
and snow-like,

390
00:16:10,836 --> 00:16:13,771
yet it keeps pests away
from our fine woolens.

391
00:16:15,307 --> 00:16:16,308
You're incredible.

392
00:16:16,308 --> 00:16:17,676
Aw, thanks.

393
00:16:17,676 --> 00:16:19,278
Okay, everyone!

394
00:16:19,278 --> 00:16:22,581
It's time to sing the Gamma
Delta Gamma sisterhood song!

395
00:16:22,581 --> 00:16:24,717
(women clamoring)

396
00:16:24,717 --> 00:16:26,207
(sighs)

397
00:16:28,654 --> 00:16:31,557
(pitch pipe blows)

398
00:16:31,557 --> 00:16:36,228
♪ There's a place
where I have many sisters ♪

399
00:16:36,228 --> 00:16:39,965
♪ A house I'll always
call my home ♪

400
00:16:39,965 --> 00:16:42,701
♪ Oh, Gamma Delta Gamma ♪

401
00:16:42,701 --> 00:16:46,705
♪ I belong to you
no matter where I roam ♪

402
00:16:46,705 --> 00:16:53,245
♪ To Gamma Delta Gamma,
faithful I will be ♪

403
00:16:53,245 --> 00:16:56,215
♪ Gamma Delta Gamma ♪

404
00:16:56,215 --> 00:16:58,884
♪ My true sorority ♪

405
00:16:58,884 --> 00:17:00,452
(women stop singing)

406
00:17:00,452 --> 00:17:03,522
♪ As a bud unfolds
to be a flower ♪

407
00:17:03,522 --> 00:17:06,959
♪ We bloom into women
from mere girls ♪

408
00:17:06,959 --> 00:17:10,329
♪ Oh, Gamma Delta Gamma ♪

409
00:17:10,329 --> 00:17:14,166
♪ Here before you
in our gowns and our pearls. ♪

410
00:17:14,166 --> 00:17:16,225
(applause)

411
00:17:18,937 --> 00:17:20,239
Where did you get that verse?

412
00:17:20,239 --> 00:17:23,609
Ah-ah-ah, read your rule book.

413
00:17:23,609 --> 00:17:26,478
Nick, you really didn't have
to sing that song.

414
00:17:26,478 --> 00:17:28,547
Oh, yeah, I did, Mal.
If you read the rule book...

415
00:17:28,547 --> 00:17:30,215
No, I don't want
to read my rule book.

416
00:17:30,215 --> 00:17:32,217
(bells jingle)

417
00:17:32,217 --> 00:17:36,121
And now, the moment
that we've all been waiting for,

418
00:17:36,121 --> 00:17:40,059
the crowning
of the 1987 Gamma Delta Gamma

419
00:17:40,059 --> 00:17:42,294
Winter Dance Snow Queen.

420
00:17:42,294 --> 00:17:44,296
(scattered applause)

421
00:17:44,296 --> 00:17:45,764
I am so excited.

422
00:17:45,764 --> 00:17:48,500
You know, I've been pushing
for you for Snow Queen all week.

423
00:17:48,500 --> 00:17:49,701
That's sweet, Nick.

424
00:17:49,701 --> 00:17:50,903
All right.

425
00:17:50,903 --> 00:17:52,638
The new...

426
00:17:52,638 --> 00:17:55,707
1987 Gamma Delta Gamma

427
00:17:55,707 --> 00:17:58,877
Snow Queen is...

428
00:17:58,877 --> 00:18:00,479
Nick Moore!

429
00:18:00,479 --> 00:18:02,470
(women cheering)

430
00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:10,912
Whoa!

431
00:18:14,126 --> 00:18:18,130
I can't believe that
my boyfriend's a Snow Queen.

432
00:18:18,130 --> 00:18:21,633
Uh, ladies, gentlemen,

433
00:18:21,633 --> 00:18:24,736
sisters...

434
00:18:24,736 --> 00:18:28,540
this is a most
momentous occasion.

435
00:18:28,540 --> 00:18:30,609
Nick, God, stop it!

436
00:18:30,609 --> 00:18:32,778
What do you think you're doing?

437
00:18:32,778 --> 00:18:36,181
Uh, Mal, I'm just saying
my acceptance speech here. I...

438
00:18:36,181 --> 00:18:38,550
Nick, Nick,
take a look at yourself.

439
00:18:38,550 --> 00:18:39,952
You're not a sorority sister.

440
00:18:39,952 --> 00:18:43,755
I mean, what are you doing in a
crown, a cape and a dozen roses?

441
00:18:43,755 --> 00:18:45,746
I won.

442
00:18:47,759 --> 00:18:49,761
Nick, you have a job here,
that's it.

443
00:18:49,761 --> 00:18:51,196
Why can't you just show up,

444
00:18:51,196 --> 00:18:53,532
punch in your time card
and go home?

445
00:18:53,532 --> 00:18:55,767
Okay, uh...

446
00:18:55,767 --> 00:18:58,370
I'll leave.

447
00:18:58,370 --> 00:19:00,105
Uh, excuse me.

448
00:19:00,105 --> 00:19:01,970
Excuse me.

449
00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:08,136
(door closes)

450
00:19:39,811 --> 00:19:42,814
She moves! She fakes!

451
00:19:42,814 --> 00:19:45,450
She pumps to the left!
She pumps to the right!

452
00:19:45,450 --> 00:19:47,352
She's all over the court!

453
00:19:47,352 --> 00:19:48,820
She sets her shot!

454
00:19:48,820 --> 00:19:50,255
- Hey.
- Hey, Mom.

455
00:19:50,255 --> 00:19:53,247
How many times do I have
to throw this thing away?!

456
00:19:59,731 --> 00:20:02,427
STEVEN and ALEX:
You're grounded.

457
00:20:06,271 --> 00:20:07,272
Hi.

458
00:20:07,272 --> 00:20:09,074
- Oh, hey, Mal.
- Oh.

459
00:20:09,074 --> 00:20:10,676
How was, uh, how was the dance?

460
00:20:10,676 --> 00:20:12,778
Aw, I had a terrible time.

461
00:20:12,778 --> 00:20:15,214
Nick spent half the evening
cleaning up,

462
00:20:15,214 --> 00:20:19,952
and then he sang
the Gamma Delta Gamma song solo,

463
00:20:19,952 --> 00:20:22,978
and then he was crowned
Snow Queen.

464
00:20:25,657 --> 00:20:28,560
Sounds like a full evening.

465
00:20:28,560 --> 00:20:30,295
I yelled at him
in front of everyone.

466
00:20:30,295 --> 00:20:32,297
I mean, there he was,
the Snow Queen,

467
00:20:32,297 --> 00:20:35,500
surrounded by
his ladies-in-waiting and...

468
00:20:35,500 --> 00:20:37,970
I just flipped out.

469
00:20:37,970 --> 00:20:39,571
Well, don't worry about it, Mal.

470
00:20:39,571 --> 00:20:41,106
Uh...

471
00:20:41,106 --> 00:20:44,810
now that Nick is Queen...

472
00:20:44,810 --> 00:20:47,479
I'm sure he'll calm down.

473
00:20:47,479 --> 00:20:50,983
Oh, honey,
didn't you talk to him?

474
00:20:50,983 --> 00:20:52,718
I mean, didn't you tell him

475
00:20:52,718 --> 00:20:54,620
you thought he was
getting carried away?

476
00:20:54,620 --> 00:20:56,154
I tried;
he wouldn't listen to me.

477
00:20:56,154 --> 00:20:59,458
He-he kept giving me etiquette
lessons and household tips.

478
00:20:59,458 --> 00:21:02,060
Well, you know, I tried
that hairspray trick.

479
00:21:02,060 --> 00:21:03,629
Really works.

480
00:21:03,629 --> 00:21:04,763
(knock on door)

481
00:21:04,763 --> 00:21:06,265
- Oh, Nick!
- Hey, Nick!

482
00:21:06,265 --> 00:21:07,599
Well, we've-we've heard
the news.

483
00:21:07,599 --> 00:21:08,600
- Congratulations!
- Yeah.

484
00:21:08,600 --> 00:21:10,168
Nick, Nick, just tell me.

485
00:21:10,168 --> 00:21:13,639
Tell me, what-what do you think
put you over the top?

486
00:21:13,639 --> 00:21:15,774
Was it talent?

487
00:21:15,774 --> 00:21:18,477
Swimsuit?

488
00:21:18,477 --> 00:21:21,546
Uh, just lucky, I guess.

489
00:21:21,546 --> 00:21:25,017
Well, it's an honor to have
the Snow Queen in our house.

490
00:21:25,017 --> 00:21:27,008
Absolutely.

491
00:21:30,022 --> 00:21:31,456
Good evening, good evening,
Your Majesty.

492
00:21:31,456 --> 00:21:33,424
Hey. Evening.

493
00:21:36,762 --> 00:21:38,864
Hey.

494
00:21:38,864 --> 00:21:40,198
Hi.

495
00:21:40,198 --> 00:21:43,368
So, uh, how'd the rest
of the dance go?

496
00:21:43,368 --> 00:21:44,970
All right, I guess.

497
00:21:44,970 --> 00:21:47,539
Um, we had to elect
a new Snow Queen.

498
00:21:47,539 --> 00:21:50,809
But, uh, you're still
the runner-up.

499
00:21:50,809 --> 00:21:52,444
It's an important job.

500
00:21:52,444 --> 00:21:55,247
Case the new Snow Queen
can't fulfill

501
00:21:55,247 --> 00:21:58,239
all her responsibilities,
you'd have to step in.

502
00:22:01,186 --> 00:22:04,589
Look, um, Mal, I've been
thinking about what you said

503
00:22:04,589 --> 00:22:07,059
and, uh,
how I've been acting lately,

504
00:22:07,059 --> 00:22:09,795
and I kind of realized

505
00:22:09,795 --> 00:22:12,097
that I went over the edge
with this sorority stuff and...

506
00:22:12,097 --> 00:22:14,433
Oh, no, no,
I'm-I'm the one who...

507
00:22:14,433 --> 00:22:16,068
I totally overreacted.

508
00:22:16,068 --> 00:22:18,370
I mean, you have a right
to have fun.

509
00:22:18,370 --> 00:22:21,707
Not every guy
gets to be Snow Queen.

510
00:22:21,707 --> 00:22:24,076
Hey, you know,
I just had no idea

511
00:22:24,076 --> 00:22:25,977
that it would
bother you so much.

512
00:22:25,977 --> 00:22:27,846
You know, it's just,
I got so caught up

513
00:22:27,846 --> 00:22:30,382
with being part of a group,
a member of a club.

514
00:22:30,382 --> 00:22:32,250
I never had that. I...

515
00:22:32,250 --> 00:22:34,119
It just felt good to belong.

516
00:22:34,119 --> 00:22:36,355
Well, I didn't know
you needed that.

517
00:22:36,355 --> 00:22:39,091
I always thought
you were a loner.

518
00:22:39,091 --> 00:22:41,860
You know, I never really
did good in group situations.

519
00:22:41,860 --> 00:22:43,259
I never really fit in.

520
00:22:44,396 --> 00:22:48,500
You see, the sorority was
the first group

521
00:22:48,500 --> 00:22:51,370
that really accepted me as me.

522
00:22:51,370 --> 00:22:53,004
I finally fit in.

523
00:22:53,004 --> 00:22:57,309
I guess I felt like
you fit in too well.

524
00:22:57,309 --> 00:22:59,277
(sighs)

525
00:22:59,277 --> 00:23:00,946
I mean, you were always
at the sorority,

526
00:23:00,946 --> 00:23:02,381
and you were always
with the girls.

527
00:23:02,381 --> 00:23:03,815
I never got to see you alone.

528
00:23:03,815 --> 00:23:06,651
And, um, I guess I felt
a little threatened.

529
00:23:06,651 --> 00:23:07,640
Why?

530
00:23:09,721 --> 00:23:13,825
Because I didn't
feel special anymore.

531
00:23:13,825 --> 00:23:16,461
Because all of a sudden,
you're-you're spending time

532
00:23:16,461 --> 00:23:18,930
with all these girls and you're
having all this fun with them...

533
00:23:18,930 --> 00:23:21,900
the kind of fun I thought
you could only have with me.

534
00:23:21,900 --> 00:23:25,937
And I... I felt like
you didn't need me anymore.

535
00:23:25,937 --> 00:23:28,373
Hey, I'll always need you.

536
00:23:28,373 --> 00:23:32,744
You are my girlfriend,
they are just my sisters.

537
00:23:32,744 --> 00:23:34,735
Well, you're my sister, too...

538
00:23:36,748 --> 00:23:41,653
Look, Mal, you are
very, very special to me.

539
00:23:41,653 --> 00:23:43,955
I am?

540
00:23:43,955 --> 00:23:45,757
Yeah.

541
00:23:45,757 --> 00:23:48,317
Because you're the only girl
that I'll ever love.

542
00:23:50,328 --> 00:23:52,455
I love you, Nick.

543
00:23:54,800 --> 00:23:56,802
I propose a toast.

544
00:23:56,802 --> 00:23:59,805
To the best janitor
and Snow Queen

545
00:23:59,805 --> 00:24:02,641
in the history
of Gamma Delta Gamma.

546
00:24:02,641 --> 00:24:05,110
(chuckles)

547
00:24:05,110 --> 00:24:07,670
Uh, you got a coaster for that?

548
00:24:35,240 --> 00:24:37,075
MAN:
<i>Sit, Ubu, sit. Good dog.</i>

549
00:24:37,075 --> 00:24:38,201
(Ubu barks)

550
00:24:40,500 --> 00:24:48,500
<b>Ripped By mstoll</b>


